Let's Talk Skin Care - Part 3 - The Essentials Continued

Review the previous parts and catch up on my skin care manifesto, won’t you?

Part I here (Includes an overview of the essentials and my suggested routine)

Part II here (Includes nothing but sunscreen)

Once again, it was when I started cleaning, exfoliating, using Vitamin C and Retinol on a consistent basis that my skin finally became pretty damn good. That doesn’t mean I don’t get acne (I do, on a monthly basis!) or that it’s never dry or dull, but if I keep up the essentials, it looks good 95% of the time.

I’m going to go through each of the remaining essential categories (Remember I did a whole post on sunscreen in Part II) and give my best recommendations, but you’ll soon start to see why this might get long (or complicated.)

Cleansers

Why use them: Because you get makeup and gook and pollution on your face. Clean that crap off!

My current lineup:

(Something organic and sustainable) Seed Gentle Face Wash

Hado Labo Foaming (super gentle and moisturizing)

This is the best AHA BHA exfoliating cleanser.  My dermatologist recommended it and sells it at her office and I love it.

Drugstore fave: Aveeno Foaming – either the calming or clearing ones. I’ve also used these for years and currently they’ve been stolen by the pre-teens in the house.

In the winter I also will sometimes use an oil cleanser, especially if I don’t have too much makeup to take off (but I’m never going to be one of those double cleanser people) and I really like this solid cleanser for travel: Woodlot Nourishing Cleansing Balm

A few skin care essentials that really work!

Exfoliation

Why exfoliate?
Because you have dead skin cells on your face and when you get rid of them, it makes you look fresher and brighter.
It also makes your skin keep working to make new cells.
It also removes the dead stuff on top so that your topicals (Your Retinoids, Vitamins, etc.) can get down in there and actually make a difference.

This explains it pretty well and this.

How often you exfoliate depends on you and how well your skin can handle it. My skin can handle gentle chemical exfoliation every other day at least.

Once again, you can simply use an AHA BHA exfoliating cleanser, like the one I recommended above.

For a gentle serum, I like this Lactic Acid - Or this AHA (with a very cool bottle) Mizon 8% AHA.

For a once a week (or even once a month) heavy duty mama jama, I’ve got The Ordinary AHA BHA Peeling Solution.  This is serious stuff. You will feel a burn. And please, slather on the sunscreen the next day.

I do like a physical exfoliant occasionally, too. Like I said, my skin can handle it and sometimes, if my face is feeling a little rough, I go ahead and use one of these:

Tony Moly Brightening Peeling Gel I know this says ‘peeling’ but it’s super duper gentle and is not nearly as serious as the Peeling Solution.

Queen Helene’s Mint Julep Scrub 

A few skin care essentials that I can’t live without.

Vitamin C

Why use it: It’s a powerful ingredient to stop aging and fight free radicals. More here: https://www.byrdie.com/vitamin-c-benefits

As I said in Part I, my go-to basic Vitamin C serum is the CSI one. I’ve gone through at least 5 bottles at this point.

I’ve also used The Ordinary 12% Vitamin C. I’m sure it did something but for whatever reason I went back to the first one when I was done.
 
I’ve also heard good things about this set of serums on Amazon that has Vitamin C, Hyaluronic Acid and Retinol all in one package.

Retinol
Why Use it: It’s a superhero ingredient that fights wrinkles AND acne, stimulates collagen and more. More info here.

I’ve used a prescription retinoid for years now so this is one area that I don’t actually have a personal recommendation for. BUT. If my prescription ran out tomorrow and I couldn’t renew it, then I would try one of these.

LilyAna Natural

The Ordinary 2% Emulsion

Neutrogena

OKAY. I know that’s a LOT of information and it may seem like a LOT of products (and it’s one reason why I personally try to find the most effective products at the most reasonable price – which I’ve shared with you!)  But once you get the essentials down, it’s pretty easy:

1. Cleanser

2. Vitamin C

3. Sunscreen

4. Exfoliant

5. Retinoid

Also, PLEASE remember that as you start to use or boost your frequency with these active ingredients, sunscreen becomes MORE important. So please don’t skip that step.

That’s pretty much all I have to say about all the Essential steps I talked about in Part I.

But I hear some of you still yelling at me:

But what about MOISTURIZER?!?!

I know, I know. I really haven’t forgotten it.

But it’s not an essential.

(I’ve shocked you, haven’t I?)

I’ll go into WHY I believe that moisturizer is NOT a skin care essential (and we’ll start to play with things like masks, snail mucin, collagen and more) in Part Four of this series, here.

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Let's Talk Skin Care - Part 2 - Sun Protection

The second part in my skin care essential series! For part one go here: Skin Care Essentials.

Let’s just start with the obvious, shall we?
1. I’m not a dermatologist or any kind of doctor or a person who is qualified to work on your face.
2. I am a woman who has read umpteen-dozen articles and reports and whatnot (and who goes to a very beautiful, perfect dermatologist).
3. I am a natural blond w/ freckles and I am of a certain age (I like to say I’m between 35 and 80. Guess.)
4. Sunscreen is the #1 MOST IMPORTANT THING YOU CAN DO FOR YOUR SKIN.
5. EVER.

Basically, I’m not going to get into the whys and hows and benefits of sunscreen usage. It’s like telling you that you have to drink water. And that you shouldn’t lick paint in old houses. Y’all, please. We’re smart enough to advance to the next stage.

A very beautiful Hillary Duff from Younger saying, “Sunscreen Sunscreen Sunscreen”

You know you should be wearing sunscreen. Hopefully, you’re already wearing it on at least an as-needed basis (days at the beach, by the pool, etc.)

Now you need to upgrade.

Do It Every Day.

Yes, this is hard. For those of us who work in the North of the Northern Hemisphere (or South of the Southern Hemisphere) we may feel that sun is not always dangerous. We may work inside 95% of the day. But there are windows and… whatever. I’m not explaining it. My very beautiful dermatologist says to do it.

Now which ones should you wear?
I should say, whatever works for you. And that’s mostly true. But you really do need a separate product from whatever is in your moisturizer/ foundation.

Here are the ones that are in my current rotation:

My most favorite sunscreens are these Japanese Biore ones. If you hate the way sunscreen feels on your face, try these. Also, the Japanese REALLY know sunscreen and are able to use ingredients that we don’t use in the US.
Biore UV Perfect Milk
Biore UV Watery Essence

My very-close-second favorite right now (and only because I just got it and haven’t bought, like, five tubes of it) is this La Roche Posay Cooling Water Sunscreen. It comes closest to the Biore Perfect Milk, in my opinion. This is the one I just took on a cruise and it worked awesomely.

The Elta MD UV Clear is a very highly recommended product. I know my dermatologist’s office sells the whole line so I bought it this spring to see how it was. It’s my least favorite right now, but I’m not sure if that’s because I’ve been spoiled by the Japanese products. Possibly, my skin also went a little weird in the last few months as the weather changed so it could have been that. A lot of people love it, so I thought I’d still include it.

If you don’t want to order sunscreen, my best drugstore recommendations are Neutrogena ones with Helioplex. My husband got this one for a trip and I’m about to steal it from him. I think “Sport Face” is a funny name but it feels really nice - as nice as some of the ones I have pictured. Also, you can find the La Roche Posay and the Elta MD in a lot of stores.

And then of course, you need sunscreen for your body.

My sunscreen lineup by the pool.

I’m not as picky about this stuff, except I like a lot of it, and I prefer it is not applied by my children because then I get sunburned on my back in an artistic swirl pattern. (Yes, we just got back from vacation. My back itches for some reason.)

So that’s the long and short of it.

TL; DR. Wear high SPF sunscreen as much as possible so you look fabulous when you’re an indeterminate advanced age.

For Part 3: The Other Essentials, click here.

For Part 4: Why Moisturizers are NOT an Essential (But here are some that really work), click here.

Let's Talk Skin Care - Part 1 - The Essentials

Before you judge me for that photo ^^… well. I just liked it. And then it felt right to me. Like, all of us who care about our skin are probably trying to undo too much of the laying out and sun damage and partying and lack of sleep and… all of the bad stuff we’ve done to our precious, delicate epidermis.

For whatever reason, people have been asking me about skin care lately. I hope that means that I have the dewy, porcelain complexion of a twelve year old novice nun but I suspect it means that I’ve educated myself on skin care products and I like to share that knowledge with unsuspecting friends.

But whatever the reason why I am being asked for these opinions, summer is upon us, and I thought it might be a good time to do a series on skin care, including my basics, tips and recommendations.

Ready?

The List of Must Have Essentials

1. Cleaner

2. Vitamin C

3. Retinoid

4. Exfoliant

5. Sunscreen

I’ve done a lot of research into French, American and Asian skin care routines and brands, serums and lotions and whatnot. I’ve analyzed organic versus chemicals and I know the difference between emollients, peptides and collagen. And I will bring more information to you about all this in the coming weeks but for now, check your medicine cabinet to see if you have all these things.

These are the five essential items that I will not go on a trip without (if the trip is longer than two days). These five things are really ALL YOU NEED for good tone, texture, resiliency, wrinkle prevention. I can maybe - MAYBE - knock one thing off this list, but I’m not going to. Because, I really think you need all five.

Question: Do you apply all five at once?

Please, NO.

Here’s the routine.

Day 1: AM

clean, Vitamin C, sunscreen

Day 1: PM
clean, retinoid

Day 2: AM

clean, Vitamin C, sunscreen

Day 2: PM

clean, exfoliate

That’s it. Do it every day.

Question: BUT WHAT FIVE THINGS DO I BUY??
I already told you to check your medicine cabinet. If you have a face wash, a Vitamin C product, a retinoid, an exfoliant and a sunscreen, just use what you have for now. The most important thing is the ROUTINE. Use up what you already own while you’re waiting on all my fabulous product recommendations. There may be some trial and error, anyway, so why waste money before you have to?

Question: BUT I DON’T HAVE ONE OF THE THINGS AND YOU REALLY NEED TO TELL ME SOMETHING TO GET STARTED WITH.

Okay, that wasn’t a question, but I get your point. Here are the cheapest, most effective essentials you can get started with before we go on a deeper dive through SkinCareLand.

1. Cleaner - I’m not judging if you don’t have a face wash.

But if you REALLY do not, start with something very gentle like one of the Aveeno foaming cleansers or I love the Hado Labo cleansers with hyaluronic acid.

2. Vitamin C serum - I’m going to direct you straight to my number 1 recommendation. Basic, not fancy but highly effective.

3. Retinoid - If you’ve never used one before, any drugstore retinoid should be a good starting point. And maybe don’t use it every other day like I recommended above. Start twice a week and USE sunscreen!!!

4. Exfoliation - I might have a whole blog post about this and why this is important to all of your skin care concerns. Most basic exfoliant? Gently rub a washcloth over your face in the shower.

5. Sunscreen - BY FAR SO IMPORTANT. Especially as we head into summer, friends. Again, I’ll have another bunch of recommendations for this but for now, find yourself an SPF 30 or higher at the drugstore and start using it all the time. You can generally find a good Neutrogena sunscreen everywhere. Look for the helioplex ones: Neutrogena Dry Touch.

And that is where I’ll leave you.

Yes, I can actually hear all your questions, like, “um, did you forget moisturizer?” No, I did not. Stay tuned, I have at least two (or three) more blog posts on this very timely subject! And have a Happy SUMMER!!!

If you have any specific questions or concerns, hit me up!

For Part 2: Sunscreen, click here.

For Part 3: The Other Essentials, click here.

For Part 4: Why Moisturizers are NOT an Essential (But here are some that really work), click here.

On Faith, Flame & Notre Dame

I had another blog post planned for today but I decided to write about what’s on my mind.

Yesterday, the cathedral of Notre Dame burned in Paris.

The spire fell. The roof collapsed. People from around the world watched, heartbroken, gutted, as fire swept through a house of worship that had stood for nearly a thousand years. All over social media people posted their stories of visiting Paris, loving Paris, being inspired by Paris and this landmark of the city that stood for 700 years before the Eiffel Tower was built.

On my last trip to Paris, I posted my own blog post on my feelings about the city. This was my contribution to yesterday’s grieving on Instagram:

This is a card of The Lord's Prayer that I have kept in my wallet since the first time I visited Notre Dame Cathedral. I pick up paper souvenirs a lot when I travel. They're lightweight and frame-able, so it's no surprise that this one made it into my suitcase. But I was surprised on that first visit to Paris at how deeply I was moved by that place. I've been to a LOT of fancy churches. I've done all the Italian duomos & the Vatican, covering my shoulders and all that. I've sung at Notre-Dame basilica in Montréal, climbed St. Paul's, even attended services with Queen Elizabeth at Balmoral. But there was something intense about Notre Dame de Paris. It's as if all of the souls who visited, worked and worshipped there since Romans settled along the Seine have left an indelible mark on those acres of land. There's a lot written about holy places. Whether humans are attracted to them or whether we create them. However it was founded, I know without doubt that one exists there on the Île de la Cité. This card reminds me that it's not a building, bricks or stone that sustains a holy place. It is people and their faith and their devotion to something beautiful and eternal. And I know something inspiring and holy will rise from the ashes in Paris once again because the people won't create anything less. #notredame #paris #notredamedeparis

31 Likes, 2 Comments - Lindsay Emory (@lindsayemory) on Instagram: "This is a card of The Lord's Prayer that I have kept in my wallet since the first time I visited..."

And the more I thought about it, the more my sadness washed away. Because once you realize that it’s the spirit of a place that moves you, not the mortar and stone, then you can’t grieve what was destroyed in a fire. Because fire does not destroy love, faith, worship, community, hope.

Notre Dame was - is - a symbol. Of civilization, of art, of creativity and devotion and, perhaps most importantly, continuity.

It has always been there. My grandparents’ grandparents’ grandparents’ would have seen a very old cathedral in the middle of Paris. Humanity doesn’t have many of these monuments, especially living ones, like Notre Dame was (is.) We have a fair amount of desiccated antiquities and ruins but someplace like Notre Dame, that decorated for Christmas and Easter, held regular services and hosted a continuous parade of guests and tourists is extremely rare.

So I think Parisians, especially, but the rest of us too treasured the life we felt there. If a building as grand and as beautiful as Notre Dame could thrive for centuries, then just maybe we - ourselves, our nations, our communities - could too.

Losing that dream hurts.

Until you remember that we are all dust. And we are all more.

We are bones and skin and failing organs. And we are laughter and passion and dreams.

Notre Dame is a spire and stained glass and stones. And it is faith, memory, and celebration.

For me, I won’t grieve the loss of stone and slate when there is so much to celebrate.

As of the time that I’m writing this, there has been no death associated with this fire. The Paris fire department was able to save part of the structure, all of the surrounding buildings and was able to remove many relics and pieces of art from the cathedral. After I read this thread on Twitter, I was doubly impressed with them. Further, stories are starting to come out about the Chaplain of the Paris firefighters who was the one to save the sacrament and the blessed crown of thorns. (The French word for firefighters is pompiers. That is a really great word, right?)

Le père Fournier, aumônier des @PompiersParis, est allé avec des pompiers dans la cathédrale #NotreDame pour sauver la couronne d’épines et le Saint-Sacrement... pic.twitter.com/4IoLVdoJZW

— Etienne Loraillère ن (@Eloraillere) April 15, 2019

You take all that into account and then you see a photo like this and, well, all I can do is give thanks.

One of the first photos from the interior of #NotreDame from Reuters' Philippe Wojazer shows the altar's cross illuminated by spotlight, with the Coustous' Pietà seemingly unharmed underneath. The statue was one of the few that avoided mutilation during the French Revolution. pic.twitter.com/xffIWXa1ax

— Jordan Fischer (@JordanOnRecord) April 15, 2019

On a total writer-ly note however… I’m just saying… just imagine what ancient secrets and priceless treasures could be revealed by a huge fire at a thousand year old building site. I mean, if Dan Brown doesn’t write that plot bunny, I might take it up.

To my beautiful Parisian and French readers, I’m sending warm healing thoughts your way.

And for all of you who observe Passover and Easter this weekend, have a blessed celebration.

The blog will be back next week with my usual dorkiness.

Queens and the F*cking Patriarchy

I had the good taste of seeing two grown ass woman movies during the holidays; The  Favourite and Mary, Queen of Scots.

I do not often get this opportunity. As I told Suzanne Baltsar in our conversation on my Women With Books podcast , since I had kids, the only movies I see at the theater contain explosions and/or Disney characters.

But hey – I wrote a royal book this year and released one and I knew I needed to see these movies, made by talented women about three women who have been British queens; Queen Anne, Queen Mary, and Queen Elizabeth I.

Watching these two movies within a week gave me lots of thoughts and lots of feelings which I will now attempt to break down. Lucky you.

If you want real, professional reviews of these films check out Time Magazine or the New York Times. They hit on some of these same points, too.

WHAT I LIKED:

1. The costumes! The accents! The beautiful sets and scenery!

2. The performances of Emma Stone, Olivia Colman, Rachel Weisz, Saorise Ronan and Margot Robbie. It’s almost embarrassing how much talent there is in that list and they all did a mesmerizing job.

3. The inclusion of minority actors and, for lack of a better word, queerness in both movies. The two movies handle this to varying degrees of success but all steps forward are um, forward and welcomed.

4. Obviously, the examination of historical women’s stories, especially women exerting and exploring their power.  This is one of my favorite themes to read and write about and we so rarely get to see it in cinema. However, this brings me to…

WHAT DROVE ME UP A WALL:

THE FLIPPING PATRIARCHY.

I mean, you cannot watch these movies and not see the greasy, pudgy fingerprints of the patriarchy all over these women’s lives. The church called Queen Mary a harlot when all she did was marry men that she was told to. Queen Elizabeth gave up marriage and motherhood because she feared that any man she married would eventually betray her and steal her throne. Queen Anne was batted around between the MEN of Parliament in order to further their political gains.

UGH.

Of the two movies, Mary, Queen of Scots infuriated me the most on this score. The themes of fertility and motherhood were pounded into the frozen Scottish peat and it stuck a pinkie toe into gender – comparing Elizabeth’s rejection of femininity to Mary’s embrace of it – and then having Mary’s choices of husband/motherhood essentially being her downfall.

I mean, none of this is news. It all happened 500 years ago so I shouldn’t get pissed off but I AM.

Because if any of these women – Queen Elizabeth and Queen Mary or Lady Marlborough and Abigail Masham – had just flipped the patriarchy the bird and decided to join causes rather than fight each other  maybe history would have turned out a bit differently.

If they had just rejected the patriarchy’s definition of “power” maybe Queen Mary wouldn’t have been beheaded. (It happened 500 years ago. I’m not putting a spoiler alert on this, y’all.)

If they had just formed a consensual polyamorous commune, maybe Queen Anne could have loved both her best friend and her new friend and not been completely miserable.

Maybe that’s going too far?

Maybe not.

WHAT I’M CONTEMPLATING:
So yes, obviously these stories have me thinking about women, power, and history.  It’s something that comes up in my books as well. Most recently, I really explored these themes in THE ROYAL RUNAWAY. Princess Theodora is inspired by her royal female ancestors – how they dared to conquer navies and divorce deadbeat husbands.

And in my Sorority Sisters Mysteries, Margot Blythe is inspired by the founders of Delta Beta sorority. How they formed a sisterhood that would inspire and educate women in a world that didn’t share their values.

It’s one of my wheels, I guess. (Reader wheels is a concept I talked about in this episode of Women With Books: Chapter 36 with Becca Syme.)

And I can’t get the thought out of my head – what would have happened if Queen Elizabeth I and Queen Mary had met in person. What world would these two women have created, if they’d been allowed or even encouraged to FULLY own their power, without manipulative, greasy dudes trying to ruin everything.

But that would have been an alternate history. And a totally different movie.

And maybe a really good book? *evil grin*

What did you think about these movies? Were you as frustrated with the patriarchy as I was? Or did you just enjoy them as winter Oscar bait movies? Comment below or hit me up on Facebook or Instagram to discuss further!